Dear Family, Since news about me has been circulating for months now, maybe even years, who knows. I am writing to clarify for myself and to you: I am not going to have children. *Gasp* It is surprising, yes that an Indian woman is choosing not to have children, but it is true. I am … More The No that Showed Me Yes
I know you always feel like there is this half or my half that weighs you down, dragging you to almost nothingness. I know you see her as your Mount Everest, except that you are not ever going to conquer her summit, and at every base camp, you are reminded of this inability. I know … More Capture the Flag
The sharp scent of chlorine winds its way to my nostril. It’s not a gentle greeting, nothing here is. No. But, I know this choreography well the scent is my first eight counts I slide in between the lane markers and push off a little jerky at first, then before long my swag is back: … More The Return
The salt and moisture slap my face I stare– eyes glued, swallowing whole every detail: colors, scents, the sea old and new Hindi gurgles low in my throat bouncing up and down, awaiting a grand entrance. Our car glides through the deep morning hours onto a bridge–it’s new. I turn to my partner, a hot tear … More Ghar
Will You–ever know the long ass journey it took on two Pan Am flights, the gapping loss I felt, the foreign tastes that I couldn’t wash away fast enough? Will You– ever know the deep-rooted longing for… the daily melding of two halves, the yearning to return and taste and smell and see and feel, … More I Will You
Gears shift, up, down park, drive, neutral, drive, park apparitions coast over, under click, clack, squeal, click, clack and I I’m still here A lil’ new, a lil’ old, a lot whole no more parts surfing on wind-threads no more slices trampled at every turn no more edges scraping tin-walls no I I’m here.
As my year off, sabbatical, leave of absence, whatever you want to call it comes to an end, it’s hard not to look back and search for meaning. When I embarked on these past twelve months, I was so sure I would be standing in a glowing white light of understanding and newness. Some of … More Twelve New Standards