Resu-me

  1.  Tele-Researcher.  Age 14-15.  Cigars & Genital Herpes Medication.
  2. Hostess at Pizza Restaurant.  Yelled at by manager. Quit next day, after crying in stairwell. Age 15.
  3. Babysitter.  Age 14-16.  Cute ass girl–Alexis.
  4. Hostess Lonestar Steakhouse.  Age 17.  Ate too many cheese fries.  Country-line dancer Saturday nights.
  5. Sales Associate. Structure now known as Express Men.  Age 17-19.  German boss loved me!  Wore mens clothing during this period.
  6. Bank Teller.  Age 19.  Read Magazines most of the day.  Spied on Dad’s bank account.  Applied Mathematics in real life.
  7. Sales Associate Ann Taylor.  Pretended I was a suit lady.  Realized I hate bureaucracy.  Age 19-21.  Spent more than I made.
  8. Assistant Studio Manager Joy of Motion.  Discovered my true self–dance baby dance. Age 19-21.
  9. Age 21-22 travel to India. Teach 6th grade.  Teach a hip-hop dance workshop. Plan fundraisers back in the US.  Graduate College.
  10. Teach Adult ESL at night.  Age 22-24.  Don’t get paid, become part of county scandal to not get paid for job.  Get paid later, but not for all the hours.  Perform with students at Christmas party.
  11. Permanent Substitute.  Age 23.  Rehearse at night till midnight.  Wake at 5AM, teach 10-11th graders with no teaching experience.
  12. Graduate School.  New York, New York, New York, New York! Age 24-26.  Forget how to sleep.  Become teacher.
  13. HR Assistant at Times Square Fancy Pants Hotels.  File. Paper-cuts.  Write. File.  Feel Adult.
  14. Nanny to Fancy Pants advertising exec. and film editor’s 8-year-old daughter.  Age 25-26.  8 year old bestie in the city.  Life is good.
  15. 7th grade Reading Intervention Teacher.  Attempt to teach Language! By attempt, more like avoid.  Age 26.  Yearbook Sponsor.  Do. It. All.
  16. 10-12th Grade English Teacher.  Breathe.  Laugh.  Find.  Fight.  Control.  Age 27-29.
  17. 7-8th Grade English Teacher.  Brace. My. Self.  Age 29-31.  EVOLVE.
  18. Tiny Chefs Master Chef.  Teach Pre-k & 5th graders to cook.  Forget flour in cookies first day!  Learn. to. love. again.  Age 31.
  19. 7th Grade English Teacher.  Age 31-36.  Meet besties galore.  Find true self.  Leave.
  20. 6-8th grade English Teacher. Age 36.  B.A.L.A.N.C.E. Baby, balance!
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